The great ages of prose are the ages in which men shave. The great ages of poetry are those in which they allow their beards to grow. ~Robert Lynd
The cold and chilly weather of the south Indian city of B'lore is the last thing one would want to even wake up in, let alone shave! However, last night, the monumental meeting of the blade and flesh was facilitated by a bucket full of steaming hot water and an intense drive to get rid of the mountain bear look which resulted in a fine young gentleman who could finally feel his face. So, in honor of the traditions of the age, I decided to write today. However in the absence of any bright ideas, I thought I would merely remark upon some observations I made in the recent past.
1. Always say nice things to girls. No matter how close a friend she might be, just don't say anything nasty even for the heck of it. And remember not to ever call her 'Plastic'. Never ever ever!
2. An internship in most cases than not is clever use of euphemism for sheer idleness in an air conditioned office with an unlimited supply of Diet Coca-Cola and super fast internet. Expect some kill time activities like blogging though.
3. From a purely statistical viewpoint, the second cubicle from the restroom door is most preferred by people when they rush to take a leak.
4. Its pointless planning outings too much in advance. For all you know, you could go to a Go Kart Track all geared up to burn some rubber only to realize there is a huge Rock competition happening on a stage set on the track!
5. Unless you are carrying a wallet which is tattered on all sides with nothing more than used bus tickets and 6 rupees in change, never board an ordinary public bus in B'lore. Did I mention the cheap jack 3 year old mobile with no SIM and contacts in it you must use in case you insist on boarding one?
6. At your friend's b'day party, don't try to make more than necessary conversation with the girl you were introduced to. It is alright even if she knows nobody else in the party and you are just being courteous by keeping her company. For all you know, she could label you a flirt the next day.
7. Girls wear black nail polish because it is the only color they can use and not worry too much about it looking good with the other accessories.
8. If somebody forgot to switch on the water heater in the morning and you still decided to go ahead and bathe, I suggest you buy a strip of D-Cold plus and a box of tissues while going back home from work.
9. When you get your first pay check, you are supposed to be absolutely jubilant about it. In case you are only somewhere near plain happy and considering depositing the check first before going about telling others, DONT! Call up your family first thing and tell them how special you feel about it. Otherwise, you might probably hear words like traitor and ungrateful dog from your sister!
10. Telugu girls from the City of Joy are cute! Especially the ones with black nail polish on their feet!
5 comments:
since when did you get facial hair? I smell exaggeration. Sniff
@ 1. WRONG.you dont have to say nice things to girls just dont say mean things. :-/ mean things that arent true especially if you're going to change your story like a slippery weasel the moment she goes all WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY I WAS? Either grow the balls to stick to the story or dont say anything at all.
PS : You dont need to shave, you never need to shave, the girl who sits 3 cubicles away has more facial hair than you do and she goes in for a "threading" every week.
PPS: you suck at flirting so who ever branded you a flirt sucks at it too or hasnt been flirted with in a long LONG time.
@ aadi: Thanq for the PPS. Desperately needed somebody to side with me n tell ppl I CAN'T flirt.
About the PS, I am not very sure of that. I really prefer a clean shaved face.
@ Everybody: The darling who commented above is the mistake I made. I am sure it is now obvious why I warned about not calling any girl "plastic"!
Your concoction of random thoughts made a good read though I wouldnt agree on all that you said :)
Point 3... It's the last cubicle that is used most often, not the second cubicle...guys prefer the wall for a reason. In case you miss - hey, it ain't hurting anybody else.
Point 6...better be branded a flirt than the Silent Assassin. Even in case you are bad at flirting, you can always pin the tag onto the girl as well as being a bad flirt. But if you don;t speak out, you can't call HER shy.
Point 7...Girls with black nail polish look Gothic :) Not that there's anything wrong with it!
Point 8...If somebody forgot to switch on the water heater in the morning and you still decided to go ahead and bathe, I suggest you buy a strip of D-Cold plus and a box of tissues ON THE WAY TO work. Unless of course your boss doesn't mind a laptop sprayed with phlegm and a coffee filled with (someone else's)snoot. :P
Point ...Must be nice to get a paycheck literally. Here I get only account transfer! :|
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